Notre prof du moment en English Language est quelqu'un qui a visiblement beaucoup d'humour. Chaque heure de cours est un véritable florilège de blagues et citations en tout genre, et il en sort tellement par minute que je n'ai même pas eu le temps de toutes les noter. Mais en voici tout de même quelques unes:
- Prof: Gowns are fantastic things to come to a lecture with. You can wave it and turn it around you... You can use it to wipe the blackboard... and you get blank looks from your students..."
(Pour la précision, il ne portait pas véritablement une robe en cours, mais il faisait les mouvements à mesure qu'il parlait, ce qui était somme toute assez drôle) (Et je ne sais même plus pourquoi il s'est soudainement mis à parler de porter une robe, cela dit en passant).
- Prof: Ok, so what is wrong with that word? [writing on the blackboard] FELLATIO. How do you pronounce it? Hands up for "Fellaishio". Hands up for "Fellashio". Ok. Hands up for "Fellaxio". Hands up for "I never use the word and I don't know what you are talking about."
[later] So it entered in english language in... well... let's say it was borrowed...
- Student: But with the sex of the dog can we use "he/she" in a sentence?
Prof: Well, my dog is named Jumble and it's been castrated so that will be "it".
- Sentence example: "I refuse to talk to her husband".
Prof: if we had to replace "her husband" by a name for example... [thinking] well, what can be the name of a husband you don't like... Ok that will be Eric.
- Prof: I am assuming that you have done your online exercise... because why would you be standing in a pub drinking when you can do your exercise?
- Prof: is the verb "love" a verb? Ok, I've got the answer in the question.
- Le prof fait son speech de début de cours, avec son programme et ce qu'on va étudier, etc... penché au dessus du bureau devant l'ordinateur:
"Now, the most important thing to start with the lecture is: How does that thing work?" [looking at the computer]
[students laughing]
Prof [serious face]: It is not funny. I am Middle Ages and I have kids to do that for me.
- Hands up if you think YES.
Hands up if you think NO.
Hands up if you think MEAN OLD MAN THAT'S A TRICKY QUESTION.
- Grammar is what makes us different from the monkeys.
- How many of you think grammar has to do with the order of the words?
How many of you think grammar has to do with spelling?
How many of you think grammar has to do with writing language?
How many of you want me to stop asking you stupid questions?
- [watching students yawning]
Is my voice more boring today? Or is it because of a terrible hangover as wednesday is the first day of the weekend?
- Ok. This is something I want you to remember on your death bed:
NOUN > NOUN PHRASE > SENTENCE.
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